An Unholy Matrimony of Blood, Fire and Death
Eyes closed, pitch blackness. A sense of evil, a seductively malevolent vibe. Apprehension as the gears of my perspective slowly creak into the lower planes. Streaking spirals of light, growing brighter and brighter until… suddenly, break through. People and landscapes in perfect clarity as if I were watching through an invisible camera. A man turns towards his wife before stabbing her violently in the back. He rips the peeling flesh from her body as insects suddenly pour out. Cut. A pool of blood, undulating with red waves. Body parts falling in, silently splashing. No sound whatsoever to these visions. Cut. A wolf, black eyes, digging into an unidentifiable corpse. Strings of meat are dangling between its teeth. Cut. Many scenes of erotica, usually ending in gory climax. My skull is but a padded cell, the walls of which my inner demons bounce off. Themes of sadomasochism, violence punctuated by guilty pleasure.
I hear sounds of sheer chaos. Screams, thumps. Dragging noises. Someone calling my name, louder, and louder. A gentle hiss and a bump. Cut. Spiders. Lots of spiders, pouring through the cracks of reality as if puncturing through this thin veil of ordinary life. I feel things gently running over my body. I don’t open my eyes. Cut. Swinging bodies on nooses, burning. Fire, blood dripping as maggots squirm into the quivering flesh. I am carrying on a conversation with something, but I do not know what. My mind echoes with distorted fragments of meaning; snippets of grand truth ripped from this primeval chaos. Lots of blood. Death. Churning corpses being flayed. Rotating scenes of razor-sharp blades dissecting through my mind. I contemplate the nature of fear in all its manifestations—here there is true, unmitigated terror. A woman reaches back and rips the top part of her skull off; a horde of black moths flies out. I hear the whispering voices of angels. Cut.
I lift my eyelids and stare into the darkness of my room to find relief from the torrential deluge of demonic imagery. My wall is covered with crawling black things. Posters and my pull up bar, dimly seen in the nonexistent light, are bending at absurd angles and then popping back to their rightful shape. Swarms of gnats have infested my room, making the darkness heavier with their presence. The wall shudders as its cracks begin to disgorge countless more denizens of the shadows. I have welcomed in the eldritch beasties of the night, and I’m here to pay them homage. I close my eyes again, and sink further into the welcome depths of Hell itself.
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My Best Meatballs + Sauce
This is the first recipe I have ever written so bear with me. I am a huge fan of red sauce italian food and of all the meatballs I have eaten, these are some of the best (at least the best I have ever been able to make). The trick here is cooking the meatballs in the oven in chicken stock, then reducing the cooking liquid and adding it to your tomato sauce. This really ramps up the flavor and also makes the meatballs extremely moist. This recipe takes a little bit of time and has more than a few ingredients, but trust me…these things are fucking delicious. Serve them with spaghetti, over polenta, in a sandwich roll with melted sharp provolone or…on their own in a bowl. Enjoy!
Meatball Ingredients
- 1 3/4 pounds ground brisket (or 80/20 ground beef)
- 3/4 pound ground pork belly (or ground pork)
- 1 cup whole milk
- 1 cup panko breadcrumbs
- 2 tablespoons salt
- 1 tablespoon sugar
- 1 tablespoon black pepper
- 1 teaspoon red pepper flake
- 1/4 cup chopped italian parsley
- 1/4 cup grated parmesan cheese
- 2 quarts low sodium chicken stock
- 1 small onion finely chopped / pureed
- 1 tablespoon olive oil
- Tomato Sauce (see recipe below)
- Preheat oven to 400 degrees. Add first ten ingredients together in a large bowl and gently work with your hands until combined. Form golfball-sized meatballs and place on an oiled sheet tray. Cook for about 30 minutes in the oven until browned.
- While cooking, add 1 tablespoon olive oil to a saucepan and saute onion with a pinch of kosher salt for about 10 minutes. Add chicken stock to saucepan and bring to boil.
- When meatballs are browned, remove from oven and place them in a baking pan. Pour chicken stock / onion mixture over the meatballs until mostly covered with liquid. Cover baking pan with aluminum foil. Turn oven down to 350 degrees and bake meatballs for one hour.
- While baking, add tomato sauce to large sauce pan and simmer. Remove meatballs from oven and add them to the tomato sauce. Reserve the chicken stock / cooking liquid and place in a separate sauce pan. Bring this to a boil and reduce liquid by 2/3. Add the reduced chicken stock mixture to the meatballs and tomato sauce. Stir and simmer for an additional 5 minutes. Serve meatballs with sauce, grated parmesan and a healthy splash of good quality olive oil.
Tomato Sauce Ingredients
- 5 cloves garlic
- 2 carrots
- 1 small onion
- 1 tablespoon fresh thyme
- 1/4 cup italian parsley
- 1/4 cup + 2 sprigs fresh basil
- 1/4 cup olive oil
- 1 teaspoon red pepper flake
- 6 oz tomato paste
- 1 cup rich red wine
- 2 28 oz cans whole, peeled tomatoes (lightly pureed in a food processor)
- 1 tablespoon honey
- kosher salt
- In a food processor, puree the first six ingredients (reserving the 2 sprigs of basil). Add the 1/4 cup olive oil to a large sauce pan over medium to medium-high heat. Add the puree to the pan with a pinch of kosher salt and cook until the puree releases all of its liquid, shrinks and starts to brown (this may take up to 30 minutes). Add red pepper flakes and cook for another minute. Add the tomato paste and cook for 5 minutes until it browns. Add the red wine and cook until it reduces out (another 5 minutes). Add the pureed tomatoes, tablespoon of honey and the 2 sprigs of basil to the pan. Reduce heat to medium or medium-low and cook, stirring occasionally, for about an hour. Salt to taste and remove basil sprigs before use.
